Mel Gibson Caught Ranting & Raving At Ex Oksana Grigorieva

Mel Gibson Caught Ranting & Raving At Ex Oksana Grigorieva

Mel Gibson was caught on tape yelling at his former girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva in a soliloquy rich in profanity and racist remarks.

GET OFF MY LAWN! must warn readers that this article contains dashes which might offend some readers.

On the tapes, recorded by Grigorieva to prove Gibson's lunacy, the The Man Without a Face star frequently refers to Grigorieva as a "wh--e," "c--t" and "b----h," according to RadarOnline.com.

Here's a larger transcript of the What Women Want star's rant:

You're an embarrassment to me. You look like a f---ing pig in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of n----rs, it will be your fault... I am going to come and burn the f---ing house down. How dare you act like such a b---h when I have been so f---ing nice?

Grigorieva, 40, claims Gibson, 54, hit her and knocked out some of her teeth. Needless to say, she has filed a restraining order against the Bird on a Wire star.

Sadly these two have an 8-month old daughter.

The best part, at least according to the website is when Grigorieva is called a "b---h" by the Attack Force Z star and she responds, "I didn't do anything." Then the Tequila Sunrise star replies, "Did so."

One of the perks about getting OLD is the ability to rant and rave like a lunatic. However, the Edge of Darkness star broke all the rules concerning the OLD man rant.

Those rules are you can't be abusive, you can't be hateful, and you can't use racist slurs.

He also omitted several key features of the OLD man rant.

One, you have to include at least one non sequitur. You have to say something that makes no sense. Like "butter is frothing the tires" or "forget the hamper since pigeons are crusty" or "lubricated raspberries and maudlin areoles."

Secondly, you can be racist but only if your racism is completely harmless. Meaning, you can only say stuff that is so absurd the targeted race wouldn't find it offensive. "Albanians are bad bus drivers!" "Indians never take the brownie from the corner of the pan!" "Columbians always wear ill-fitting galoshes."

Thirdly, you have to eject spittle from your mouth, move your arms around incongruously, and if possible, sometime during your rant ensure that your hair becomes disheveled.

Finally, and this has nothing to do with the OLD man rant, but never ever ever ever ever yell at women named Oksana. It's like yelling at a woman named Sophia, Jasmine, Gabrielle or Swapnasundari.